Previously, on The Marriage of the Century: the Chronicling of Institutionalised Love Within Societal Boundaries And How It Conquers All, time was running out for our intrepid organisers in the hellish whirlwind that was matrimonial preparation, feverishly threading decorations and cutting tape with the awful awareness of the likelihood that anything that could go wrong would go wrong, terrified and exhilarated by the uncertainty of what the next day would bring.



( The Wedding Everyone Is Talking About, For Real This Time (Really!) )


I, however, was not drunk, nor afforded said felicity, and having spent the better half of the decade (I exaggerate, what I really mean is the better half of the last three days) recounting this triumphant, fun-filled occasion, am confronted with the awful reality that that world is not my world, and really I should go forth into the world and decidedly reject failure and SEEK MY TRUE DESTINY.